I met my husband at a self-development workshop in 2010, and the context in which we met set the tone of our relationship. We treated our connection as the priority. We went to workshops and retreats together and did deep inner work. In the first three years of our lives together, we fostered deep loving connection on a daily basis. Our commitment to each other and the health of our relationship meant that we dived into whatever came up and emerged on the other side stronger and more loving for it.
Then our kids arrived. Since then, life has been like one ongoing retreat, except the emphasis has shifted towards parenting. These last three years, we’ve been working to be more conscious parents. And although our love for each other is still there, our relationship has been taking a back seat. Now that kids are growing and we’ve got a bit more childcare support, we’ve started 2016 strong: committing to regular dates and searching for ways to deepen our intimacy. Still, compared to week-long retreats exploring the alchemy of relatedness and connecting to each other from what felt like the source, sometimes our current efforts just scratch the surface.
This is why I’m excited to be reading Succulent Wild Love: Six Powerful Habits for Feeling More Love More Often by SARK (aka Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy) and her partner & fiancé Dr. John Waddell. As the title of this book implies, it’s about finding a mate and building loving relationships. More importantly, it’s about creating more love in life and feeling it.
“We all want more love, and we want love that feels good,” write SARK and Dr. John. “The wisdom in this book — the six powerful habits — will enable you to love more and be loved more. You will be able to take your relationships with the most significant people in your life from ‘I love you anyway’ to simply ‘I love you’ — releasing tension and fear and getting the support and affection you want.”
The six habits of people in Succulent Wild Love relationships are:
- They listen to their relationship mentor inside them — their Inner Wise Self, Higher Self, Holy Spirit — and take action.
- They use their feelings both as a guide to know when the relationship is off track and to constructively evoke cooperation from others.
- They recognize inner critics and other negative dialogue in their head and don’t put this criticism on their partner — or themselves.
- They respect their own and their partner’s boundaries.
- They create “Joyfull Solutions” where no one needs to compromise or sacrifice.
- They practice seeing the perfection in their partner and all the other people they’re in relationships with.
It’s a fun book with lots of exercises which unpack these principles and allow you to take a hard look at your relationship in the kindest way possible. As with other SARK books, this one is bursting with colour and juicy wild creativity. There isn’t a single dull page in the book. Soaked in colour and wisdom, it has the potential to lift you up and transform your relationships.
I definitely look forward to getting back on track with my love life in 2016. Here is to Succulent Wild Love in all our relationships!